Learning to Exhale

phases of letting go

The house is quiet, even though the day outside is bursting with a Summer time flow of walkers, bikers, and cars.  Inside, it's quiet.  No one else is home, magnifying the sound of our quiet refrigerator.   Saer is at work, and my boys are off on their various adventures.   Riley is away at his first sleep away camp, and Keller is exploring the shops of Boston with friends.  Though part of me LOVES the time in spaciousness, I also feel a longing to have their vibrant presence here with me again.  

Becoming a mother has been the most profound teacher of learning what it is to truly let go.  I was lucky enough to have both of my boys naturally.  I felt the stages of my belly's growth mirroring their phased development from seed, to pea, to grapefruit, and lucky for me, even watermelon!  We were literally connected, sharing heart beats, breath, DNA.  What a flipping miracle.  

Then,  exhale.